my Buddhist blog number 165

Hi Everybody,
 We're right in the middle of what I think is a really important chapter on Buddhism and Happiness, and we're picking up where we left off last time, answering the question ' can we buy it? ' And that leads us on a to a discussion of a key factor in all our lives that the psychologists call ' hedonic adaptation.' So here goes.

' So whatever external thing we desire in the belief that it will bring us significantly greater happiness, however much we convince ourselves that we need it, however profoundly life-changing  it might seem when we desire it, and indeed when we initially acquire it, turns out not to be so life changing after all. Indeed not at all.

There's no question that can be a very difficult lesson for us to take on board. We are so profoundly attached to the idea that these kinds of acquisitions will make us so much happier. But the body of research to the contrary is very substantial indeed. Hedonic adaptation is real!

So what does that mean in terms of our ordinary daily life? Well it's clear that although we may well get immense pleasure and satisfaction, and indeed a burst of genuine rapture at the moment of acquisition, and for a while afterwards, all the research shows that the while is vanishingly brief! The rapid adaptation to the new acquisition, or the new circumstance is an integral part of the human psyche, and from then on we're back to where we were. Square one. The new whatever becomes very much a part of the ordinary fabric of our lives.

And I think there's very little doubt, if we search even briefly through our own experience, few of us would suggest that our fundamental sense of well-being, or happiness in our lives has been substantially altered by any new material acquisition. The new car, the new kitchen, would we really say tha tit has re-shaped our happiness. I think not.

So this hedonic adaptation would seem to be the modern psychological explanation for a factor that Buddhism has been talking about for so long, namely that the external possessions  in our lives, or changes in those possession, even if on the surface they are quite substantial, have in fact a remarkably small impact on our enduring sense of well-being. It can be a profoundly unhappy-making delusion to believe that enduring, deep-seated happiness can be acquired in this way, externally as it were, as a result of some possession. any possession.

We only have to give that a moment's reflection to see that it amounts to a prfoundly behaviour-changing, life-changing lesson.'

Plenty enough for one swallow.
Thanks for reading.
See you next week.
William
PS The Case for Buddhism is available on Amazon and as a download on Kindle.

my buddhist blog number 164

Hi Everybody,
There's beena bit of a gap because Sarah is playing at the RSC in Stratford on Avon and I've spent a bit of time up there with her.Today's episode is about what Buddhism calls the life state of hunger, and what modern psychology calls hedonic adaptation. OK here goes.
Since it lies at the root of a great deal of self-inflicted pain and suffering...and that's the key point to note...it is self-inflicted. it is our choice...Nichiren Buddhism considers it important enough to flag it up for us, by giving this  itch-to-acquire stuff a name. It's called the life state of Hunger. Basically this is a state of more or less constant, restless dissatisfaction with our lives because we convince ourselves that our happiness lies in having something, or experiencing something that is just out of our reach. And in this life state, there is nearly always something that is just out of our reach. This restless dissatisfaction is not limited of course to just material things. It reaches out to into all the fields of human activity you can think of, from the desire for particular relationships or partners to the desire for more wealth than we happen to have, or status or fame and on to regaining youth and beauty through plastic surgery say. There's always something to want or yearn for. And it's by no means uncommon for people in this life state to fix their gaze on one thing after another in their environment, in the sure and certain knowledge...each time...that this will satisfy their deep hunger and bring them the happiness that so far has just eluded them.

The extraordinary thing...and i use that phrase advisedly because it is I think genuinely surprising...that modern psychology recognises something very similar indeed to what we have just been talking about. The term it uses to describe it is ' hedonic adapatation,'  Hedonic comes from the Greek word that means pleasure. Adaptation speaks for itself. So put simply this somewhat esoteric phrase means that we adapt with astonishing speed to new stuff., to any new material goods that we acquire. It simply becomes the new norm.

' The things that  we get used to most easily and most take for granted are our material possessions...our car, our house,. Advertisers understand this and invite us to ' feed our addiction' with more and more spending.'

But the key point to note is that the new acquisition changes nothing in terms of how we feel in the depths of our lives. Nothing changes in terms of our fundamental sense of well-being. '

Ok enough for today. Back at the end of the week with another episode.
Best wishes,
William
PS The case for Buddhism is available on Amazon and on Kindle.

my Buddhist blog number 163

Hi Everybody,
Had a busy time over the past few weeks. The great  news is that a  major Italian publisher wants to put out this book and an earlier one called Buddhism and the Science of Happiness in various formats, including paperback and audio. I have to say I'm totally blown away by getting such support, so  I've been busy getting the various bits and pieces to them.

If you've been following the previous episodes we're in the middle of the chapter on happiness and we're talking about the dilemma that often confronts us in modern society where we have often allowed who we are to somehow become synonymous with what we have.

So what does Nichiren Buddhism have to say to help us re-balance ourselves in the face of this constant materialist onslaught that can deeply undermine our sense of self worth? It makes it clear right from the start that it is not about rejecting material possession. It's not about denial, or giving things up, since that doesn't of itself achieve anything. Nichiren Buddhism fully embraces both the material and the spiritual aspects of life, because both are clearly important to us. The absolute key it argues, to establishing a durable sense of well-being is awareness, recognising the situation  for what it really is seeing the threat to our stability and understanding that we need to establish a meaningful balance.

So for example, people who take up this practice are encouraged to chant for, and of course to take action for whatever it is they believe they need to achieve full and fulfilling lives. And that might certainly include material things, from a better income and financial security for example, to a better house and everything in between. Such things are an integral part of all our lives and can't simply be left out. But undoubtedly as we continue with the practice it radically changes our perspective. It puts the constant wanting of  things into a broader whole-life context.

while acquiring new things can undoubtedly be an extremely pleasurable experience...and why shouldn't it be indeed...it cannot be the basis for the solid, lasting, resilient sense of well-being that we all seek. The pleasure in new possessions soon wears off, very soon in fact. And the only way to re-ignite that sort of pleasure is to get out there again into a fresh bout of retail therapy! We've all been at least some way down that road. Just look at the level of global credit card debt that was exposed in the crash of 2008. All we need we repeatedly persuade ourselves is that something else in the shopping mall or the showroom window....and we'll be really trulyt happy. Promise.

And then something else catches our attention...and on and on.

We're into the world of what Buddhism calls Hunger sate, and modern psychology calls Hedonic adaptation.

And that's where we go next time.
See you then. Best wishes,
William
Tne Case for Buddhism is available from  Amazon and as a download on Kindle

my buddhist blog number 162

Hi Everybody,

We're in the middle of this chapter on Buddhism and Happiness and we've just been talking about what has become known as the ' materialist dead end'. That is to say the powerful external cause of inner discontent represented by all the ' stuff' that's on offer wherever we look. Retail therapy may well be therapeutic in the short run, but  the research clearly shows, it doesn't deliver the stable long term sense of well-being that we all seek. But that having been said we can't just blank it all off can we? The range of material possessions has never been greater, and with the instant global reach of film and TV and the internet, the circle of comparison that we are drawn into is virtually unlimited. The consequent potential for what we might call induced dissatisfaction with our lot is all the greater.

And it's important to note that it's not simply a matter of envy. Not at all. Positive psychology has even coined a phrase to describe the downward spiral into which it is all too easy for us to be drawn. It's called ' reference anxiety.' The emotional burden if you like of constantly trying to keep up with the material wealth we perceive so many other people as having...but not us! We have allowed who we are if you like, to somehow become synonymous with what we have.

So what does Nichiren Buddhism have to say that might help us rebalance ourselves in the face of this constant materialist onslaught that can so deeply undermine our sense of self-worth. Well it makes it clear right from the start that it's not about simply rejecting material possessions. It's not about denial or giving things up, since that doesn't of itself achieve anything. Nichiren Buddhism fully embraces both the material and the spiritual aspects of life, since both are clearly important to us. We all have both material and spiritual needs. The absolute key it argues to re-establishing a durable sense of well-being is awareness; recognising the situation for what it really is, seeing the threat to our stability and understanding that we need to establish a meaningful balance.

And it's that balance that we go onto explore in the next episode.
Hope to see you then.
Best wishes,

William
PS The Case for Buddhism is available from Amazon and as a download from Kindle

my buddhist blof 161

Hi Everybody,
We're in the middle of a discussion about the nature of happiness in the modern world and we've come to the question that we're bound to bump into sooner rather than later...what about buying it? We cover the complex issue of Buddhism and Money in chapter 11 but we can't leave this happiness discussion without at least touching upon the immense importance most of us attach to the role of money in any picture of happiness we paint for ourselves. It's bound to crop up in any modern discussion of what constitutes well-being. And if Buddhism is daily life...what does Buddhism have to say about it, to help us in our approach, and what kind of additional insights can the social scientists provide us with?

Edward Diener for example, from the University of Illinois, psychologist and eminent researcher in this field, is one among many who has written about the materialist dead end or what he calls the downside of today's vastly greater affluence. And there has been a huge amount of research by him and others that points to two key ways in which this has a profound effect in diminishing our sense of well-being, both of which I suggest, could sit quite comfortably in the middle of a Buddhist commentary about the suffering that can come from just....wanting things!

One is that there is so much to be hungered after in our modern society, so much more on display in glossy showrooms and shopping malls and supermarkets and so on, that it has become a powerful external cause of inner discontent. It's a bit like all those sweets and chocolates on display at the checkout queue that can cause children to kick up so much fuss. They want them because they can see them, and can't understand why they can't have them. In very much the same way people can experience a real sense of loss and deprivation and frustration because they can't possess, can't carry away more of the stuff that's on display. In no way is it difficult to empathise with that frustration. It rings absolutely true. Most of us have been there to some degree.
The second is related to the vast wave of media of all sorts that washes over all our lives these days. So we are all constantly being called upon to measure ourselves, who we are and what we have against an endless procession of supposed role models in film and television and countless life-style magazines who are presented as being highly successful and vastly better of and therefore by implication....so much happier!

The equation seems to go wholly unquestioned, success equals wealth equals happiness. Although of course we all know intellectually that that is sheer nonsense. There is no such simple connection, or indeed any connection. But emotionally it gets to us.

and that of course is precisely the way the modern marketing and advertising machine goes to work, playing with immense skill on our natural human tendency to compare ourselves with others, and therefore focus on what we haven't got, as opposed to what we have.

That is to say, it is another immensely powerful external cause of inner discontent.

Once again it's clear that Nichiren Daishonin was acutely aware of exactly this same human weakness when he highlights the futility and the intense suffering that can come from that sort of comparison itch. He writes,

' For example a poor man cannot earn a penny just by counting his neighbour's wealth, even if he does so night and day. '

OK enough said I think for one episode. Been very busy for past couple of weeks on a writing brief so missed a couple of episodes. I'll be back middle of the week tom pick up the argument.
Best wishes,
William

  

my Buddhist blog number 160

Hi Everybody,
We ended the last episode with some words from a very wise Buddhist teacher who put it to me once that if we think in terms of pursuing happiness in some way then we are very much on the wrong track. Where do we start? In which direction do we run? We come much closer to it he argued if we think of happiness as a sort of by-product, a quality that comes into our lives when we take action to create value in some way, particularly in ways that have beneficial effects in other people's lives.

It's fascinating to find that view echoed directly, even down to the choice of words, by a modern psychologist, when she writes in her recent book, The How of Happiness;

' ...even the familiar phrase ' pursuit of happiness ' implies that happiness is an object that one has to chase or discover...I prefer to think of ' creation' or ' construction' of happiness because research shows that it's in our power to fashion it for ourselves.'

So we are getting a closer fix on what we mean when we use this happiness word aren't we? It's certainly not just forcing ourselves to be cheerful regardless of what is going on. We don't get much joy if we try to chase it. And it doesn't just happen to us as a result of good fortune.

The kind of durable, deep-seated, and above all resilient well-being that we a re talking about can't simply be dependent upon the play of external events. This happens and we like it...and we're happy. That happens and we don't like it...and we're unhappy! A bit like a cork in a swell. Now up, now down, dependent upon what comes our way.

It can only come, we now understand, from one place, it has to come from within. We have to make it, through the values that we hold, and the choices that we make, and the kind of value-creating actions and responses that we fold into our lives.

Enough for today.
Thanks for reading.
Back next week asking the question...can we buy happiness?
See you then I hope.
William
PS The Case for Buddhism is available on Amazon and as a download on Kindle

MY BUDDHIST BLOG NUMBER 158

Hi Everybody,

We're in the middle of this chapter that is exploring the nature of happiness, which Buddhism goes so far as to describe as the ultimate motivator in human life no less. And we've reached the point where we're looking at two fundamental qualities that are deeply interwoven into the Buddhist understanding of well-being, both of which seem to be equally well borne out by what the social scientists tell us they have learned more recently.

So one is that well-being, happiness if you will doesn't exist just in our own heads so to speak, although we commonly believe that to be the case. We evolved very much as members of a group. That basically is why we have been so successful as a species, and we are in our deepest nature very much gregarious animals. We need strong relationships. Our inner sense of well-being is generated essentially through the nature of the relationships we establish with the world around us, from the basic pleasure we take in our environment through to the experience of lasting and fulfilling and harmonious relationships at all levels in our lives. When we experience them they strengthen and reinforce our creative energies so that we feel liberated in a sense, and we find that we can achieve so much more in our outward lives. When those relationships break down for whatever reason, the effects can be devastating in all areas of our life, not simply those associated with the relationship. We are not only less happy, we operate as individuals under stress, out of harmony with ourselves and our environment, and our performance is greatly reduced.

The second understanding, no less profound, is that our own well-being is not in someone else's gift, we have to make it for ourselves. As Daisaku Ikeda has expressed it for example,
' Happiness is not something that someone else like a lover can give to us, we have to achieve it for ourselves.'

That is undeniably a hard lesson to learn, because our wants are so many and because we commonly believe that our personal happiness is indeed dependent upon our partner for example, or our child, or our job. Or on earning a million pounds. Whereas Buddhism tells us that we have to go out and make our happiness for ourselves out of our own determination and action. Just as Stephen Post was asked ( in an earlier blog!) by his perceptive mother to take some action, to go out and help someone to lift him out of his bad mood.

And that phrase ' take some action ' carries a profound truth of its own. As one utterly practical Buddhist teacher put it to me once, if we think or pursuing happiness in some way, then we are very much on the wrong track, because none of us knows how to achieve that. Where do we start? In which direction do we run? We come much closer to it he argued, if we think of happiness as a sort of by-product, a quality that comes into our lives when we take some action to create value in some way, particularly in ways that have beneficial effects in other people's lives.'

Nuff said for today I think.
I'll be back at the end of the week.
Hope to see you then.
Best wishes.
William
The Case for Buddhism is available on Amazon and as a download on Kindle.